What "No" feels like

The day started out so great. Hope was in the air, things were looking really good. And then my friend heard that dreaded word, “No.”  What a discouragement. More than that, hearing a “No” can feel like a startling slap in the face sometimes. Under certain circumstances “No” can feel like rejection, under other circumstances “No” can feel like a stern rebuke. Sometimes “No” can be just plain confusing, I mean after all that planning and seeking wise counsel, preparing and asking for prayer.

"No" always feels bad. Especially if it is something we really want. Or need. We are convinced we need it and “No” gets in the way and limits us. It feels like forever. It seems so powerful at the time. A good, stern “No” can instantly wipe away every “Yes” from the past. It can tap into all the disappointments we’ve faced along the way and make them seem permanent. Sometimes it seems as if “No” right now means “No” forever. But what is the truth?

Comfort from friends can accidentally add a real sting to that slap in the face. Yet we want to comfort, and encourage. Is there a way to do that without adding to the sting, without sounding trite? I think it depends on the relationship. I wanted to encourage, to say just the right thing to fix it. But I couldn’t. There are no words that work. Not from me anyway. Believe me, I tried. Every time I typed something (we were communicating through messenger) I had to backspace and delete it.

Then, looking back over previous conversations, I was encouraged by a verse that this same friend had recently shared with me. A verse from the Bible about how God has His plans, and He is faithful to carry those plans out. So I typed that verse in a message. I felt strongly that I wasn’t to add an emoji (even though I really wanted to, as my kids will tell you) or my take on the verse, or how I think God will use this verse in his life. Just God’s Word.

Right away my friend let me know he was encouraged, “I was very sad, and now I am strengthened,” He wrote. (Well, I certainly can’t take credit for that one) Sigh. I’ve been pondering this afternoon how God’s Word is alive. I am thankful. Hope lives.